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Releasing Your Inner Slut

Women's Fashion: Part V, Releasing Your Inner Slut is an interesting article written by women, for women. As such, men such as myself will use it to gain insight into women's minds.1 After all, Cosmo only publishes a few such thought-provoking, well-researched, all-too-revealing articles per month!

"It's not slutty, it's fun" says Reese Witherspoon to kick it off. Reese, multi-million-dollar actress, mother, and wife of a multi-million-dollar husband/actor/father surely has her pulse on the average American woman! And surely her entire series of thoughts is encapsulated in this one thought! What insight we have gained already!

What about modesty? Humility? Saving it for the guy at home? Screw that. There's nothing wrong with feeling pretty, sexy, fabulous. It's especially affirming to feel that way in front of a large audience, Tina-Turner style.

I'll agree with that. I'm a big fan of confidence, and I think confidence is sexy.

Illusion is our friend.

Perhaps sometimes that should read "deception is our friend." I made the comment last night to someone that her hips sticking out the top of her running pants were ultra-sexy, and she admitted that she knew it. It looked good. No illusion there. Elastic waistband? No slippage there.

Rule 3? Be comfortable. My own earlier post on this says:

Am I the only guy alive that thinks "cuddly" is still sexy? That comfort breeds confidence - and a whole different kind of confidence that you don't get by covering up your bare breasts and flicking off the camera - and that this confidence is sexy?

I'll express disappointment with this part:

It's difficult to seem fun and impossible to seem dangerous in a pair of Gap khakis. No one ever felt like purring in a polo shirt.

I like the preppy look. "Casual sophisticated" as I like to call it (or at least, as I just now made up). Hmmm. I guess that really is a stupid point to be making against an article informing women how to dress like sluts.

More articles for putting off doing your taxes learning about women's fashion can be found here. Remember, men: the more we know about our enemy the better prepared we are for the coming war. Y'know, "dating." What, you thought I was being political? Bah.

Footnotes

1 Not really. If you can't tell that this is sarcasm - as are several other parts of this entry - stop reading this blog and go somewhere else.

5 Responses to "Releasing Your Inner Slut"

  1. I think casual is definitely sexy. Like Jennifer Aniston on friends, I always think she looks the hottest when she has on those little cargo type pants with the flaps over the pockets on the back. I have no idea what those kind of pants are called. I'm not much into fashion. She just looks damn hot, when it seems like she is trying the least.

    And about the clothes thing... Clothes are good. They leave something to the imagination. I know there are a lot of movie stars that I would love to see naked. It's just the stuff dreams are made of. Then I actually see them naked, and suddenly they don't seem that interesting anymore. The game is over. You have the facts in front of you, and can't use your imagination anymore.

    Go do your taxes! 😉

  2. Slightly OT: Trackback on yourself? I guess that's what they call self-referential...

  3. Well, I say here that people who stumble onto an earlier article shouldn't be deprived of seeing any updates, corrections, or continuations. Internal TrackBacks allow that.

  4. I agree with Erik. I'm just now stumbling onto an almost six-month-old entry and find the internal trackbacks useful. Now, if only I knew how to use trackbacks.

  5. omg i am huge major slut n i want your mom in my pants please respond to me oke thanx cuties.. n remeber...fuck your mothers