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Cynical Me

Danielle didn't show up yesterday. Go figure. This "friend" of mine from Cleveland is largely responsible for my recent bout of cynicism. She's done nothing but lie to me, use me, and otherwise abuse what was once a very soft heart for a sob story. I was lulled into being compassionate, and she took advantage.

She took advantage of my "weakness." I bought her a car so that she could get to her job - a job she was working to support her younger brother and sister because her dad was a drunk and her mom was marrying a guy from Jordan (or something like that).

Danielle has worked at strip clubs and Denny's. She's miscarried and lost a two-year old child. She's started - and dropped out of - school several times. She studied to be a nurse once. She bought her own condo and two cars, yet mysteriously can't ever find the $5,000+ that she owes me. After all, you only make $500/night stripping.

Her "best friend" Brian - a guy who literally may or may not even exist - died from a car crash recently. Her dad died a few months ago. Oh, and please add "supposedly" to every one of these sentences, because I believe nothing of what she says. Nothing.

I could cite countless other things, and all of the above has taken place over the past 3-4 years. Early on I talked to Danielle for hours every day. I was suckered in. Now I feel stupid for having been a caring person, when really I was just being stupid. Gee, what a great person.

I would say that I regret every moment and every dime spent on her, but I don't have regrets - just intelligent observations about my past. She taught me to be cynical. She taught me to treat every sob story with steel wool gloves. She taught me that people aren't honest, people aren't respectable, and helping someone else sometimes leaves you broke: emotionally, monetarily, and physically.

Danielle is out of my life. I've attempted in various ways to get her out before, but this time I simply won't cave in. She can call all she wants, email all she wants, etc. She won't ever show up to face me in person, so I won't have to worry about that.

I sent her my address - again - this morning. I'll not be waiting for that $5,000. Of course I hope she proves me wrong (I could use a new computer around July…) but I'm 101% sure I'll be right about this one. I won't get back a dime, a minute, or an ounce of the money, time, or compassion wasted on her.

Fuck you, Danielle, for making me cynical. I only hope that your impact on my life is quickly and painlessly washed away, because I think compassion is a good thing, and regardless of your behavior, I want to know again that not everyone is as horrible, evil, and supremely fucked up as you.

Goodbye, Danielle, and good riddens riddance.

8 Responses to "Cynical Me"

  1. Welcome to the Cynical Bastards club. You can only join by having a women refer you to us.

  2. *ahem* it's riddance. *ducks*

    delete me.

  3. I learned this one the hard way - not with a girl, though. I always assumed that the money was gone in those cases... I "invested" a sh!t load of money with a friend who lost it all after I wanted "out." He says he'll pay me back... I doubt it. Give a friend money... if he/she pays it back, you get a Christmas present...

  4. Hey man, sorry to hear about your situation. I just got my t-shirt and newsletter from the Cynical Bastards Club, I suggest joining. It does really bug me to the core when you realize that people can suck so much and have so little value of relationships that you're ready to write them all off. But then something happens to pique your interest again. Don't think of your dollars as wasted -- you got a good education. You won't make the same mistake again. But she also threw a nice ole monkeywrench into the section of your brain responsible for dropping defenses. Good luck!

  5. Ah, the life of the geek, being nice to people, being that "nice guy" to get support from, and then getting fscked (and not in the good way) in the end. I've been there, done that, gotten the VP role at the cynical bastards club at one point. It sucks, which is why I love computers, they don't lie, cheat, have feelings, or screw around with your emotions, yet still provide you with the ability to view naked women.

    Glad to hear that you're out of it, and be strong! I know how hard it is to resist when someone comes crawling back.

    Hmmm.... I had a lot of strife caused by a Danielle a few years back, wonder if it's the same one 🙂

  6. Even though computers don't lie and cheat, they can lead you to get jobs with people who lie and cheat. For instance, cheat you out of $3,000 after you spend your entire summer writing a giant storefront.

  7. Who isn't linking to this story today? It's a tale of how one guy's blog saved him from a very, very, very, very bad relationship....

  8. Question: If you could take back any gift you've given but now wish you hadn't, what would it be? My Answer: Anything and everything ever...