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Local Knowledge

There's a strip near where I live that features two short sections of road (broken up by stoplights) and a longer third. Tonight, at the start of the first section, I pulled up (in my Aztek mind you) next to a guy and a girl in a Mustang. I nodded, then proceeded to floor it (nearly - I can't floor it entirely or I peel out) and whip their ass to the next light. At that light, I again floored it and the guy tried to impress his girl (but, sadly, lost again). At the next light, I nodded and smirked, then pushed the gas hard only to back off at 20 MPH.

By the time the guy realized that I had not gone ahead, the guy had hit 60, no doubt impressed his woman with his car's power, and garnered himself a speeding ticket from the cop that always sits in the middle of that third stretch on Thursday nights.

Now you know why this post is titled "Local Knowledge."

8 Responses to "Local Knowledge"

  1. Local knowledge is a great thing 🙂

    When I was in high school, a bunch of us went to the movies after classes got at for spring break at noon. One of my friends ripped through the back roads about 20 miles over the speed limit. When we got to the theater, somebody in another car cornered him and said "Your damn lucky one of the three cops that sit on that road didn't bust you!"

    His response - "Naw, it was their lunch break."

  2. You ass.


  3. man, i'm going to have to meet you. 🙂 you are sunburned from jupiter/lox river kayak run and the next day shut down a mustang with an aztek on either congress or atlantic? are my god, i'm not worthy. omg, not worthy. You rock, Erik. BTW, I'm near the ocean and have free outdoor space for your kayak if you and Jose haven't remedied (sp) you storage space. Then I want to race you in my Saturn, A1A & Geo Bush Blvd to Manalapan. Howdy neighbor. if this happens you can sell me some software on the spot. The jupiter run sounded excellent.

  4. It was on Linton, actually. And the storage space? I keep my kayak in my apartment. And c'mon, the lamest Mustangs - the cheap ones - are really quite crappy. A kid on a bike could give them a good run for their money.

  5. You are mean! On the other hand, the guy in the mustang would seem to be stupid, so it's all good!

  6. wow! must have been a v6 - those v6 crustang drivers get very uppity (I think it's because they're embarassed it's not the v8...)

    but it's a good thing he saved the money on getting the v6 instead of the 8 - now he can pay off the speeding ticket 🙂

  7. Heh. I've seen a commercial where they do more or less the same thing you did. Funny stuff.

  8. If only I had put my local knowledge to use. I work in a corporate park, you know, the ones with the really nice wide 2 lane in each direction roads with the easy turns and sloping hills that are just begging to be taken at 80 but have 30 fucking mph speed limits. As I was driving to work for my first day this summer, I said to myself "Before the summer is over, you will get a ticket on this road." And here it is, exactly 5 days before I finish working their, I get a ticket.

    I should have known there was a cop there, I hadn't seen him before, but it's blatantly obvious that you could get gunned there. I had JUST pulled out of my parking lot after 10.5 hours at work, and had hit 58 in that 30 mph zone. I'm actually lucky he gunned me when he did because apparently at 60 I get my licesnse suspended. He was nice to me though, he only wrote me up for 40 so it was only $124 and 2 points, but it says 58 on the ticket so I can't exaclty fight it. I really didn't care that much, I think of it more as a tax on how fast I drive normally :).

    Just thought I'd share. I love my little Ford Focus, best car for the $$$.