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QotD: Calling

Question: How long after you get a girl's phone number should you wait to call her to set up a date?

My Answer: Hell if I know! That's why I'm asking!

You are encouraged to answer the Question of the Day for yourself in the comments or on your blog.

11 Responses to "QotD: Calling"

  1. It's common here that the girls get the phone numbers (fear of being molested via the phone), so that's not really my problem 🙂

    Last time I got called on the very next day, though.

  2. Mike: So how long do I wait to call?

    Trent: A day.

    Mike: Tomorrow.

    Sue: Tomorrow, then a day.

    Trent: Yeah.

    Mike: So two days?

    Trent: Yeah, I guess you could call it that, two days.

    Sue: Definitely, two days is like industry standard.

    Trent: You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think?

    Sue: Yeah, but two's enough not to look anxious.

    Trent: But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you...

    Mike: Yeah, but you know what, mabye I'll wait 3 weeks. How's that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number.

    Charles: Then ask her where you met her.

    Mike: Yeah, I'll ask her where I met her. I don't remember. What does she look like? And then I'll asked if we f****d. Is that... would that be... T, would that be the money?

    Trent: You know what. Ha ha ha Mike, laugh all you want but if you call too soon you might scare off a nice baby who's ready to party.

    Mike: Well how long are you guys gonna wait to call your babies?

    Trent, Sue: Six days.



  3. I think the question is "how many times do you call her making sure she has your number properly before you look like a complete and total loser". I dont' have the answer to that either, wish I'd known it ages ago though, like before the 15th call 🙂

  4. I was reading the above and thinking, "This sounds like Swingers." I finally caught on that it *was* Swingers.

  5. Disclaimer: These things are never 100%, girls don't even know what they want so how can we know what every single one wants. Also, I have absolutely no Moves or Game so I've never actually field tested these techniques. I'm not an expert, I just play one on the internet.

    In my opinion, there are three categories. They all have different balancing points between you woo-ing her and you setting off the looser, clingy, psycho, what's that growth all about, why didn't he like me alarms in her head. Note: blind dates, "I think I like you for more than a friend", and post walk-of-same phone calls are not covered in these three categories. You're on your own with those nut-job.

    Category One: She's all in. (call her now, dumbass)

    If you can tell the girl was really into you, there's no such thing as too soon. If the "number gathering" was a category one, don't go over a week, heck don't even approach it. If you do, she'll feel blown off. It's tough to go wrong here, but don't get too cocky - think before you dial.

    Category Two: Quick Chance Meeting, she's open to new things, but you had no time to show your "A game".

    If you're in this category, well you got the number, nice work (as long as it's not 867-5309). 2-6 days works well here. Remember, the ice is harder to break in category two, and the thickness varies based on how drunk she was at the time. I'd suggest a couple days, and have something in mind to talk to her about. "Uhh, so I'm the guy from the other night" followed by silence is a deal breaker lame-o. Hopefully you picked up either her job or a hobby out of the conversation -- (note to self: her name wouldn't hurt either). Suggesting a 1 on 1 date in this situation is not a great idea, unless it's a very public place - think stadium. Maybe a "some friends are going out to on Friday, and I didn't get a chance to brag myself up the other night" is in an great choice here. Encourage her to bring Friends, but don't require it (you may have misjudged and you could scare off what was really a category one, moron). This may be obvious, but if you call her at 3:00 am on your way home from the club you just met her at with a, or "Im going to be lonely in my big queen size bed", or "Ayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy" game over slick. Last chance category two entry goes to: "you got her number from a friend and she really bragged you up" - girls don't trust guys opinion of other guys.

    Category Three: "This time I'm really gonna do it." You've been stalking this girl since 3rd grade, and you got her number from her garbage. (exaggeration, but more likely you asked for her number and she said, how about you give me yours... but you persevered and got the number anyway. Congrats my friend, you've got balls)

    This is where you have to be brave, and anything less cool than "I've got 4 tickets to blah blah, and had an open seat" and she buys it... well, that's nothing short of amazing stud. 4-9 days works here, wait too long and she may forget who the hell you are. Last chance category three entry goes to: "you got the number from a friend and he really bragged you up". Always end this call with something like, "well you have my number, if you don't call I can take a hint".

    Anything outside of these three categories and you either, already hooked up with her and haven't quite made up since you sent her home without cab fare, or you have no chance in the world buddy, move on.

  6. Lots of things influence the answer to this question. Age, station in life, level of interest shown, how you met, how long you've known her before you got the number, you're intent for the situation, etc

    I take things slowly so I'd call the next available evening. So, if I got the number in the afternoon it would be that night. If at night... tomorrow night. Then I'd call and try to do something innocuous to create a pleasant environment where I can get the know the girl without any pressure on either of us. Of course, I'd still want to be the activity to be something she could tell her friends about with pride. That's a must.

    From there I would just play it all by ear.

  7. Call her for a date set up when you feel alright. I mean the 'mood of the day' feeling. Because it's better if you get an answer like "oh yeah hi Eric but at this very moment I got a lot of stuff to do and please would you call later again? thanks, bye" and you take her words serious and you don't start to misintepret things. Imagine you are calling Monica Bellucci - probably you won't remember her words but her voice. So just enjoy your Monicas voice and see what's happening, if you feel like...

  8. is 20 minutes too soon?

  9. Turns out the question has complicated itself. She works 9-5. I waited one full day and called the next at 12:30… to leave a voicemail. I suppose I'll try again tomorrow, and after that, the ball will be entirely in her court.

  10. I think I need to work on when it's appropriate to get a girl's number before I worry about when to call her...

    Does that make me a loser?:(

  11. Jo-Pete: getting a girl's number is the easy part, compared to the rest...