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The Microsoft Ho has returned to her pimp. Yes folks, that's right. The whore herself, Robert Scoble, is now an employee of Microsloth, Micro$oft, or whatever other lame, childish title you wish to assign to one of the largest publishers of Mac (oh, and Windows) software in the world.

It should go without saying that all this "ho" business is a bit of a teasing game with Robert and myself, though I say should go without saying, but obviously, as I'm saying it, it doesn't.

P.S. Just because I'm teasing him about being a ho doesn't mean he isn't one, too. 🙂

P.P.S. I'm doing my part to get him fired as quickly as possible. Read his post before you think that makes me sadistic.

Short order cooks are a rare breed these days. And what about customer service. I'm the customer, but where is the service. I like to call IHOP "dohi" because it's IHOP spun 180 degrees, and I bet they have short order cooks, right? But they also seem to have the worst waitresses ever. They mumble and probably drip jerry curl juice in your food while they're carrying it to you. I like the Swedish pancakes. Mmmm.

This 60-second entry was brought to you by today's word from OneWord™.

Question: If you could read the mind of someone famous, who would it be and why?

My Answer: [Snide answer]: George W. Bush because I've already got enough going on in my day that I don't need any extra thoughts popping up unexpectedly. [Actual answer]: Steve Jobs. A bit cliché I'm sure, but the guy's got a lot going for him: he owns one of the most successful animation studios and computer/software makers in the world, is constantly in touch with unimaginably intelligent people, and has charisma to boot. He's a "complete package" so they say, and unlike, oh, Stephen Hawking, with Steve I probably have a chance of understanding what's going on. 🙂

You are encouraged to answer the Question of the Day for yourself in the comments or on your blog.

Who will be worst this week? The blondes need to step it up. Josh Gracin needs to step it up. Clay, Rubin, Kimberley, and Trenyce seem likely to make the final four, though I want the first two to sing some different kinds of songs. Let's see how it all goes tonight.

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When I think of a candle I think of a dinner with someone special, or those Yankee candles I get 25% off for getting the flavor (errr, scent) of the month from BB&B. Last night I burned a "Christmas Cookie" one I have left over from Christmas. It wasn't dinner, but my companion sure as heck looked good. I had joked that she might look better by the cool glow of a PowerBook screen, but that ended up not being true. Right now I'm burning a Honeydew candle. It smells good. Candles: smell good, maybe burn house down.

This 60-second entry was brought to you by today's word from OneWord™.

Jeremy talks about the burning of Iraqi libraries and museums, some of which house items thousands of years old:

As I say, I'm having a hard time with this so don't expect rational arguments from me. I guess Bush and company can be happy that their war finally achieved something that will keep it in the history books for a long time to come.

Like our Shrub, I went through a period in my life when I didn't value museums or libraries, too. I think I was about six. 🙁

Need to feel better about yourself? Put yourself in this "poor" woman's shoes:

I have met a twenty-six-year-old male who has many things going for him: absolutely amazing in bed (quite cunnilingually gifted!), intelligent, and possessed of a razor-sharp wit. Of course, the reason I'm writing to you is because he is, to put it delicately, UGLY.

That's putting things delicately? Gee whiz. The woman then goes on to say that she's embarrassed to introduce this boyfriend of hers (for six months) to her family and friends. Read the advice column answer here. Summary: grow up or come clean.

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Question: If you could arrange for one thing to happen to your spouse (or boyfriend/girlfriend) without them knowing you arranged it, what would you plan?

My Answer: I would plan a surprise cruise, partly because I've always wanted to go on one (free food 24/7!) and partly because it's a romantic way to spend a few days with someone, catch up on your tan, etc.

You are encouraged to answer the Question of the Day for yourself in the comments or on your blog.

Question: If you had to choose the most extreme example of sexual harassment, what would it be?

My Answer: One of my college professors made very little effort to conceal the fact that she wanted me. I managed to milk a few easy 'A's out of her, though, so I don't really care. I guess I'm not purty enough to have been sexually harassed.

You are encouraged to answer the Question of the Day for yourself in the comments or on your blog.

Today I took my prepared tax return to the post office and deposited the bastard in the mail. The envelope looked like this:

It had about ten sheets of paper in there, so I stuck on four $0.34 stamps and two $0.37 stamps. That should do it. The amount of the check inside was considerably higher. 😐

I've been noticing a lot of people signing up for the FSS Mailing List today. Now I know why. On Friday's Call For Help, the show Chris Pirillo used to run, Leo Laporte mentioned that he may show how to run a screen effect as a background this week. Brad, author of BackLight, which does this, wrote to him. Leo responded:

Awesome, Brad. I'll plug it today. Looks like you all do some very cool stuff!

As linked above, you can see the link to FSS at this Call for Help show notes page. Once when Bob LeVitus was on The Screen Savers he mentioned Memogram, another piece of FSS freeware.

Jamie would like some help:

…help me generate a thesis for a term paper in Gender & Technology. I plan on suggesting new educational and occupational (company policy) practices that would help to further close the gender gap in the Digital Divide.

Y'all are smart, so hop over to Tits and Wits .com and leave a suggestion.

I'm off to run some errands for a few hours, but I wanted to point out that Safari 1.0 Beta 2 is available here or via Software Update.

Will write more later. I've been using later versions for awhile now and I'm curious if some crashes, etc. that I've continued to have (antipixel.com crashes Safari v69 regularly) have been cleaned up.

All versions of Safari - including 1.0b2 (v73) routinely mess up my <pre class="small">. I've defined that to be a smaller font size than <pre>, yet Safari v62-73 all render them the same size. v60 did it properly. Here are two lines:

This text is wrapped in a normal pre tag.

This text is wrapped in a pre class="small" tag

You can see my stylesheet (which validates as proper CSS) here. Note the "pre.small."

Update: I've since modified my stylesheet to just render everything "pre" the same size. Screw it.

This site now validates as XHTML 1.1. I spent a few hours working on this - had to change the nesting of some things, had to hack at my stylesheet a little (hspace, vspace, border aren't XHTML 1.1).

Only one problem remains: MovableType puts target="_blank" in when someone gives a URL with their comment. This causes individual pages to fail when such a comment w/URL is present.

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Have a look at this:

Where'd that come from? Early sketches of Mac OS X? NeXT? Try the Lisa. There's more Lisa information here.